The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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