why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
