All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
