I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
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