Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Randomize
