Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
When did angry sex become our thing?
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Randomize
