i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Everything about him screamed your future.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Randomize
