Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
