You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
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