That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Sorry about my life...
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
