STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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