Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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