I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
