are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
