oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
