Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Randomize
