Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
