**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Randomize
