found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
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