I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
