For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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