just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
