I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon�
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
