if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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