Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
How's work?
Spinning.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
