so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I just cut my nipple shaving
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
