You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
