Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Randomize
