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Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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