So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
