I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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