My hand turned me down
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
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