the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
