There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I will pee on everything he values.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
we're so committed to being not committed
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
