Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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