just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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