Already got asked if we're dating
He had one of those small greek statue penises
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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