You're a womanizer and a bitch.
end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
