Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
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