I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
