Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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