So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
