Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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