I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Randomize
