im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
