my mouth tastes like poor choices
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize