Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
