bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize
