You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
We had sex on a dog bed..
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Randomize
