If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
